Monday, November 07, 2005

Shaleen

“If there is any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now and not deter or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again.” --W. Penn

We heard the news late Friday night—the kind you hope never to hear. A friend of our family’s had been killed by a drunk driver. So in between my many fits of tears, I’ve been thinking about Shaleen and what she has meant to us over the years. Her death has been very hard on our entire family, and we find ourselves unable to articulate why exactly it is so. We first met Jimmy and Shaleen when they stopped in at our yard sale many years ago, and that was the beginning of a very dear relationship with the Johnsons. It did not take long to see that Shaleen was an extraordinary lady who loved God unconditionally. “God is so good!” you’d hear her say over and over. One only had to meet Shaleen to get a little taste of Jesus.

One of the things I appreciated most about Shaleen was the way she befriended my mother over the years and showed her every kindness, respect, and true friendship. Every year on Mom’s birthday—without fail—Shaleen would show up with a small gift she had made just for her. And when she would leave, she would tell my mother, “Love you, Girl!” Shaleen could bring out the best in others. She saw people through the eyes of Jesus. She was never critical of anybody, and she wouldn’t listen to criticism either. She served God by serving others, and for her, it was something she delighted in doing. Shaleen could be counted on to brighten even the worst of days.

Shaleen’s creativity added to her charm. Going to Shaleen’s house was always so much fun because you never knew what new and creative thing you’d see. She loved to organize small parties and host social events at her house. When I taught school, Shaleen allowed me to bring my students out to her house, and she organized games for the children to play. When I moved to Kansas for three years, it was Shaleen who thought I should have a farewell party, and it was she who hosted a small party for me at her house. She routinely hosted luncheons, tea parties, baby showers, and suppers—and all with the flair that only Shaleen could give.

Shaleen firmly believed in expanding your network of friends. She would invite ladies over to her house for luncheons. The ladies were all to bring a friend, but when they arrived, they were to switch partners and make new friends.

I met up with Shaleen in the grocery from time to time, and each time, she would ask about my family, and we would catch up. She always spoke of her own family with such love and devotion. Her daughter Darla was a news anchor for a local television station, and Shaleen would faithfully tune in to hear Darla’s broadcast. When Darla and her husband moved away from this area for a period of time, each time I saw her, Shaleen would tell me how she is just praying for the day when Darla can return, and she just knew in her heart that “the Lord would work it out.” And indeed, He did.

The last time I saw Shaleen was about a month ago at her house. She was hosting a baby shower for Mom’s friend Nancy. While Nancy was out on the deck opening gifts, I went inside briefly and found Shaleen talking on the phone. After she hung up, she told me she had been talking with Darla about a disappointing event. “Keep her in your prayers,” she said.

After I learned of Shaleen’s death, I pulled out a photo she had sent me when I was in Kansas. On the back of the picture, she had written the following quote from William Penn: “If there is any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now and not deter or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again.” And in a nutshell, that was Shaleen. She was always looking to show someone a kindness or to give someone a word from or about the Lord. In an email she sent to friends earlier this year, she wrote:

“On February 8, 2004 my mother passed from this life into heaven for eternity. On the same day of her death, I had the privilege of leading my brother and a teenager to the Lord. Two were born again on the same day of my mother’s death. What a bitter sweet time Feb. 8, 2004 will always be in my heart.”

Last night, our family got together with Nancy to try to work through this awful sadness we feel. Nancy and Mom were recalling being at a funeral with Shaleen less than a year ago. All at once, Shaleen grasped both their hands and said, “Girls, when I die, I don’t want you to cry for me; I want you to celebrate!” Nancy said, “Of course, we’ll cry, Shaleen!” and Shaleen said, “Now don’t you do it!”

Yes, Shaleen, we’ll celebrate with you. We know you are in a much better place, and we know you’ve earned every star in your crown. But we’re also crying… ‘though not for you. We’re crying for us. You’ve left a void in so many people’s hearts. We love you for the things you’ve taught us, the things you’ve given us, and the ways you’ve blessed us. We love you, and we will never, never stop missing you.