The Local Sewage Pipe

Mar 1, 2004

If air could be transformed into sewage, Sharon and I would be about waist-level right about now. The Man Upstairs (our new renter) seems to have a smoking problem. He promised us prior to moving in that he and his woman would not smoke inside the house... and we have no reason to doubt that he is being true to his word. However, there still remains the problem of the second-hand smoke which seems to cling to their clothes, furniture, and every fiber of their beings. I'm sure they cannot smell it, and in fact, I'm positive they think they are maintaining and preserving a perfectly wonderful environment for us. Well, It just isn't so, for we share an air-return; our lovely little underground world is fast turning into the local sewage pipe.

Sharon and I arrived home at the same time tonight, opened the door, and tried not to gag at the foul-smelling odor that assailed us. Imagine the smell of a hotel room which has been smoked in. That's exactly what it smells like, times five. Our house, mind you!!! We took one look at each other and decided that a trip to Wal-mart was certainly in order. Once a luxury, candles have now become a necessity. I pulled all my spare candles out of my reserves and with $50.00 in newly acquired purchases, we now are burning fourteen candles. Ahhh... the beauty of a sweet-smelling candle... imagine smelling vanilla, french vanilla, hazelnut cream, christmas cookie, pumpkin pie, buttercream, irish creme, cinnamon spice, vanilla hazelnut, and vanilla cream all at the same time... and we've got Starlit Garden, Evening at Home, Rainshower, Spa Fresh, and Citrus Splash all sitting in reserve just waiting... for such a time as this.

I think we may have enough fire power in candles that we may not need any more heat this winter. Problem solved, eh? We are also well-equipped with two flame snuffers and extra lighters. Now if we can just keep the fire alarms at bay, we'll be alright...